I read most of what comes up on my computer, so I will say I did read it. But then my wife of 62 years had jus passes away on November 2. When we have an urge to write, it is part of the gift from God to write. We must write and not hide it. God bless.
I’ve not read this part of your story before, Corey. I’m glad you have enough new subscribers to justify the repost. I’m glad you had a daughter who motivated you to get where you are now. I’m glad, I think — because I also want to punch him in the face — you had an unorthodox asshat intake doctor who ignited your rage. I’m not sure that’s what you needed, but it might have been. I’m glad you found an outlet in writing and that you’ve been willing to make yourself this kind of vulnerable. We all have our demons.
I think I did miss this first time around, Corey. I should have gone back to the prior posts but somehow it slipped my mind. As always, honest and hard-hitting, and you’re right about both ego and pride. Look forward to your new prologue to this!
But was it not a fear of death that motivated you?
If so, then I'm kind of surprised you didn't find religion. My father had a death wish of sorts. It was only religion that kept him sober...for twenty-five years. Then he left the rule system and that was that. Turns out he really needed a fear of death to scare him straight.
How perfect. Dancing with Demons . I’ve chased them
Away. Hmmm almost. Years of mental gymnastics. That’s my story to post when I’m ready . All of my former posts Wordpress are short , chock full of “famous” in my life. Some alive still. Recovering. Addiction to this. That .. my son sober 13 years his drug of choice booze. Could down a bottle of jack. Now 40 married 3 years ago stunning lady and one year old girl. He didn’t like AA beginning of sobriety. Now in DC his community is two eve a week group. Centers him. Also bipolar 2. Struggled mightily for years. Finally right meds. I have 5 sisters and come from a long long line of addicts. But if course as we were from Beverly Hills our faux masks firmed gorilla glue. Thats all for now. You write with clarity and ease. Your voice needs to be listened to. Keep on. Jenn
This story was beautiful. Your writing is engaging, relatable, and I just want it to keep coming. I aspire to write and publish and converse with a community of readers and writers as you do and have here. Do you have any suggestions on getting started? This kind of honest, vulnerable, raw writing is impressive, and something I aspire to do better...especially as a way of managing, handling, and understanding my mental health issues and past trauma.
Excellent. Here are the first few lines from a piece I haven't been able to finish:
I have two little brothers, though both larger than I, fallen victim to the agonizingly slow suicide of addiction. Two very different stories of incredibly talented humans. The crippling sense of loss still creeps into my thoughts daily along with a naggingly frustrating lament of helplessness. As they withdrew and built ingenious walls to hide their troubles I continued to accuse myself of not doing enough to help. I still wonder.
"Nothing I say stays. It must be mixed and mashed, stirred and beaten. I try to lock onto the perfect words, one sentence—the one—a string of verbs and nouns so complete that they understand me. Dreaming or not, the words lead me. They need me as much as I imagine they do. But see, I romanticize, lose sight of the goal, and must start again."
God, this really is writing, isn't it? This entire piece - these flashes of memory amongst a much longer and more wearisome journey - is spellbinding. Well done.
The doctor’s technique was surely unorthodox, but partly understandable, especially if he had just watched his own brother die of cirrhosis.
I’m a family physician. Last year I lost three patients in their early forties to cirrhosis from alcohol. Nice people. And they melted before my eyes.
I’ve seen the same rapid collapse from diabetes untreated. Sometimes I have had two young patients in the same month lose a leg from complications of untreated disease.
One man always smiled. He was so cheerful, but his glucose was always terrible. I cared about him, so I tried getting angry. It didn’t work—and I no longer try the angry technique. (I still do a little prophetic discussion though, hopefully just enough.)
I’m pleased to report that my happy “noncompliant” diabetic patient is now doing great with continuous glucose monitoring. And he, of all people, gets angry with diabetics who ignore their disease.
Thank you for allowing me to read this in full. It is stunning writing. I hope loads of people get to read the paid posts in future. You are quite right to go down that path.
Wow Corey, thanks for sharing this. I have my own struggles with alcoholism but as the loved one of alcoholics... your writing helps me understand better what they're going through. And congratulations!
Very nice piece, Corey! It's very inspirational and life-saving for someone who has been there and done that! I think that we all have to come to terms with the fact that every single one of us is addicted to something, and the only way we can do that is to stop, take a deep breath, and put away our pride and ego!!
I read most of what comes up on my computer, so I will say I did read it. But then my wife of 62 years had jus passes away on November 2. When we have an urge to write, it is part of the gift from God to write. We must write and not hide it. God bless.
I’ve not read this part of your story before, Corey. I’m glad you have enough new subscribers to justify the repost. I’m glad you had a daughter who motivated you to get where you are now. I’m glad, I think — because I also want to punch him in the face — you had an unorthodox asshat intake doctor who ignited your rage. I’m not sure that’s what you needed, but it might have been. I’m glad you found an outlet in writing and that you’ve been willing to make yourself this kind of vulnerable. We all have our demons.
I think I did miss this first time around, Corey. I should have gone back to the prior posts but somehow it slipped my mind. As always, honest and hard-hitting, and you’re right about both ego and pride. Look forward to your new prologue to this!
But was it not a fear of death that motivated you?
If so, then I'm kind of surprised you didn't find religion. My father had a death wish of sorts. It was only religion that kept him sober...for twenty-five years. Then he left the rule system and that was that. Turns out he really needed a fear of death to scare him straight.
Thanks and good luck!
How perfect. Dancing with Demons . I’ve chased them
Away. Hmmm almost. Years of mental gymnastics. That’s my story to post when I’m ready . All of my former posts Wordpress are short , chock full of “famous” in my life. Some alive still. Recovering. Addiction to this. That .. my son sober 13 years his drug of choice booze. Could down a bottle of jack. Now 40 married 3 years ago stunning lady and one year old girl. He didn’t like AA beginning of sobriety. Now in DC his community is two eve a week group. Centers him. Also bipolar 2. Struggled mightily for years. Finally right meds. I have 5 sisters and come from a long long line of addicts. But if course as we were from Beverly Hills our faux masks firmed gorilla glue. Thats all for now. You write with clarity and ease. Your voice needs to be listened to. Keep on. Jenn
Finish your novel !
This story was beautiful. Your writing is engaging, relatable, and I just want it to keep coming. I aspire to write and publish and converse with a community of readers and writers as you do and have here. Do you have any suggestions on getting started? This kind of honest, vulnerable, raw writing is impressive, and something I aspire to do better...especially as a way of managing, handling, and understanding my mental health issues and past trauma.
Excellent. Here are the first few lines from a piece I haven't been able to finish:
I have two little brothers, though both larger than I, fallen victim to the agonizingly slow suicide of addiction. Two very different stories of incredibly talented humans. The crippling sense of loss still creeps into my thoughts daily along with a naggingly frustrating lament of helplessness. As they withdrew and built ingenious walls to hide their troubles I continued to accuse myself of not doing enough to help. I still wonder.
Keep doing this. The world needs your voice.
"Nothing I say stays. It must be mixed and mashed, stirred and beaten. I try to lock onto the perfect words, one sentence—the one—a string of verbs and nouns so complete that they understand me. Dreaming or not, the words lead me. They need me as much as I imagine they do. But see, I romanticize, lose sight of the goal, and must start again."
God, this really is writing, isn't it? This entire piece - these flashes of memory amongst a much longer and more wearisome journey - is spellbinding. Well done.
This was worth rereading, Corey.
Had some whiskey at the weekend. Still recovering here.
Stay strong!
The doctor’s technique was surely unorthodox, but partly understandable, especially if he had just watched his own brother die of cirrhosis.
I’m a family physician. Last year I lost three patients in their early forties to cirrhosis from alcohol. Nice people. And they melted before my eyes.
I’ve seen the same rapid collapse from diabetes untreated. Sometimes I have had two young patients in the same month lose a leg from complications of untreated disease.
One man always smiled. He was so cheerful, but his glucose was always terrible. I cared about him, so I tried getting angry. It didn’t work—and I no longer try the angry technique. (I still do a little prophetic discussion though, hopefully just enough.)
I’m pleased to report that my happy “noncompliant” diabetic patient is now doing great with continuous glucose monitoring. And he, of all people, gets angry with diabetics who ignore their disease.
Troy A. Thompson, MD
Thank you for allowing me to read this in full. It is stunning writing. I hope loads of people get to read the paid posts in future. You are quite right to go down that path.
Wow Corey, thanks for sharing this. I have my own struggles with alcoholism but as the loved one of alcoholics... your writing helps me understand better what they're going through. And congratulations!
Very nice piece, Corey! It's very inspirational and life-saving for someone who has been there and done that! I think that we all have to come to terms with the fact that every single one of us is addicted to something, and the only way we can do that is to stop, take a deep breath, and put away our pride and ego!!